In Week 5, everything seemed very normal. I didn't even have to think twice about any of the games. I still only went 8-6. I think it's time for me to start being a little more crazy in the picks. One could also say that as the season progresses, and I lose track of more of these teams from not watching football, that could also lead to my poor picking. Oh well, let's try it out:
Manwich Matchup of the Week:
Seattle @ New England-
That's right, I still think this is the best game of the week, despite Seattle just collapsing last week against the Rams. The Patriots have a million positive things going for them- the best team, defending champs, a new stud RB, the longest winning streak of all time. What happens when you get them in a shootout though? The Pats probably win. BUT, I think the Seahawks will be steaming mad after last week's debacle, and that's enough for me to begin the point in the season when I start picking against the Patriots for almost no reason.
Pick: Seattle
Upset of the Week:
Houston @ Tennessee-
Everyone thinks Tennessee is fine just because they ripped up a pathetic Green Bay team. Will guess what? The Houston Texans don't quit! They forced OT against Minnesota! And don't even get me started about the other tough teams the Texans have played (San Diego & Detroit- SEE BELOW). The Texans are for real, and this game will put them on the map.
Pick: Houston
Miami @ Buffalo-
Tune in to this week's epic Toilet Bowl showdown! The battle of the only 2 winless teams! Miami K Olindo Mare got injured last week, and the Miami kick returner ended up kicking a field goal, an extra point, and a kickoff. He also tackled the returner! It's too bad this may be the highlight for the team for the season... since I think the Dolphins are using a 3rd-string QB, a 4th-string RB, a 5th-string RT, and a 6th-string waterboy.
Pick: Buffalo
San Diego @ Atlanta-
I almost made this the Manwich matchup of the week. You read that right. Vick, battling the team that traded him away, for other draft picks (Tomlinson & Brees) and a WR (T. Dwight). Fantastic storyline AND San Diego is actually good this year! San Diego already has 3 wins. I just don't think I have the balls to jump on the bandwagon this week, but if they win, I've got dibs on one of the seats next week.
Pick: Atlanta
Washington @ Chicago-
It's amazing how quickly the media can turn on Joe Gibbs when he only has 1 win.
Pick: Washington
Cincinnati @ Cleveland-
What are the odds of the Browns losing to (2) first-year starters in back-to-back weeks? I hope they are low.
Pick: Cleveland
Green Bay @ Detroit-
So, does everyone realize now, that if you Green Bay gets behind, they can't catch up? And does everyone realize that their defense is one of the worst? And does everyone realize that Ahman Green is intent on trying extra hard for yardage, so he fumbles at least once a game? Good, I'm glad we got that straight. AND- the Lions are for real.
Pick: Detroit
Kansas City @ Jacksonville-
Another great game. I'm not sure what to make of Jacksonville's D after getting shredded by San Diego last week. I think with 2 weeks to prepare, Vermeil should have his guys ready to begin a long road back to .500.
Pick: Kansas City
San Fran @ NY Jets-
I just don't believe in the 49ers. The Jets are barely winning, but in the words of Coach Edwards, "That's why you play the games! To win!" Thanks coach for clearing that up.
Pick: NY Jets
Carolina @ Philadelphia-
This Panther team really is the 1999 Atlanta Falcons, losing 1-2 players every week due to injury. This week, they welcome back RB S.Davis, after losing RB D. Foster for 6-10 weeks.
Pick: Philadelphia
Pittsburgh @ Dallas-
This is another game that is very interesting. Can the Rookie Redhawk Roethlisberger pull out 4 in a row???
Pick: Pittsburgh
Denver @ Oakland-
Am I the only one who really could care less about whether Jerry Rice gets a catch, whether he's benched, or whether he's traded? Seriously, Jerry Rice is like 42 years old and about 5 years past his prime. The coaches are right to bench the guy- that UNC point guard from '96 (R. Curry) is a lot better right now. Rice will still be the greatest WR of all time, but he's just too old right now.
Pick: Denver
Minnesota @ New Orleans-
It will be another exciting, high scoring shootout in a dome for the Vikings. This game will have high ratings Sunday night due to the large amount of fantasy players involved.
Pick: Minnesota
Tampa Bay @ St. Louis-
I bet ABC would love to get rid of this stinker of a game. At least Tampa won a game last week. Also, Coach Martz always makes the game close whether he has a big lead, or needs to make a big comeback.
Pick: St. Louis
Last Week: 8-6
Season: 47-27
Manwich Matchup: 2-3 (thank you Titans for spanking the Packers)
Upset Special: 3-2 (I guess doubling down on the Cardinals was a bad idea)
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
Monday, October 11, 2004
5th Street: Wild, Wacky Week especially out West
Well just when you think you have this league figured out, it throws you another a curveball. Case in point was out in the NFC West: the 2 best teams (Seattle v. St.Louis) and the 2 worst teams (San Fran v. Arizona) played. Both games a team had a huge lead. Both games incredible comebacks occurred. Now no one is really surprised if/when Arizona's defense collapses and they lose, but Seattle?!? The Seahawks had the number one rated defense going into the game. They hunted, sacked, hurried Bulger and forced three interceptions in the first half. At the end of the first half, Seattle was leading 24-7, Mike Holmgren was already diagramming plays for next weeks game against the Eagles and the Seattle fans were drinking coffee (well they always do that). But coaching genius Mike Martz (a man that admits fewer mistakes than George Bush) had Seattle just where he wanted him.
In the third quarter Martz used the Marshall Plan and scored three points, softening the Seattle D via repeated kidney punches and all Faulk all the time. In the fourth quarter and OT the Rams, despite a Seattle defense that blitzed cornerbacks, linebackers, and possibly a tank, outscored Seattle 23-3. How did this happen?
In the fourth:
9:26 Bulger finds Manumaleuna the Slender in the end zone. Holmgren responds by continuing to eat his celebratory bag of dorritos. No worries, yet. Seattle 27-17
11:30 Bulger throws a 44 yard bomb to Kevin "Who" Curtis. Holmgren responds by sticking pins in Marshall Faulk voo-doo doll. Mike Martz seen doing the running man. Seattle 27-24
12:30 Shaun Alexander hit by tranquilizer gun. Seattle forced to punt. Holmgren makes sacrifice to Pan, the god of Goats.
14:52 Marc Bulger, channeling St. Hannah (patron saint of comic book super-heroes), leads the Rams down the field with no time outs, setting up Jeff Wilkins who hits a game tying field goal. 27-27.
OT Rams win coin toss. Holmgren electrifies end zone in last ditch effort.
3:02 into OT Bulger hit a random fan ( Shaun McDonald) streaking down the sideline on a 52 yard pass play for a touchdown. Holmgren found in fetal position crying for Binkie his Teddy Bear. Rams win 33-27
2. Alright stand up if you predicted San Diego over Jacksonville, Detroit over Atlanta and New York over Dallas. Keep standing if you also predicted that Detroit, NY Jets and NY Giants would be a combined 11-2 and Tennessee, Green Bay and Kansas City would be a combined 4-10. If your still standing you will be committed to an insane asylum. Coaching matters (witness the Giants finding an offensive line and Detroit finding a clue) but so do injuries and the return of Chad Pennington and Jeremy Shockey can't be overlooked.
3. If there is one permanent fact in the NFL these days (besides Janet Jackson off the Christmas Card list) it is the New England Patroits. 19 straight wins. Cheers all around for Brady's razor sharp accuracy or the offense line that opens holes and gives the QB time. But as the Detroit Pistons showed in the NBA , great defenses, teamwork and turnovers go a long way. While this Cleveland native hates admitting it, Bill Bellichek always has his teams on all cylinders.
The Turn
4. Is there anything more fun (or common) in baseball then second guessing the manager? Was Johan Santanna pulled too early? Should Houston have left Roger Clemens in longer? Did Torre/Francona not use/use their closer/starter/porsche at the right time? Nonetheless if Boston is finally going to get over the CURSE it seems only fitting that they have to go through the Yankees.
The River (random thoughts)
5. If Chaos Theory is correct and the flapping of the butterflies wings in North Dakota produce a hurricane in Indonesia is it possible that by writing this article I am influencing the outcome of a sports game? Do you think the Browns regret not drafting Ben Roethlisberger now or will take a few more losses? After all that debate of taking Phillip Rivers or Eli Manning I find it ironic that its Big Ben playing. How bad is OSU playing, coach Jim Tressel has lost complete confidence in the power of his sweater-vests. Finally, how much more leeway does Joe Gibbs have before Daniel Snyder puts his foot in his mouth.
In the third quarter Martz used the Marshall Plan and scored three points, softening the Seattle D via repeated kidney punches and all Faulk all the time. In the fourth quarter and OT the Rams, despite a Seattle defense that blitzed cornerbacks, linebackers, and possibly a tank, outscored Seattle 23-3. How did this happen?
In the fourth:
9:26 Bulger finds Manumaleuna the Slender in the end zone. Holmgren responds by continuing to eat his celebratory bag of dorritos. No worries, yet. Seattle 27-17
11:30 Bulger throws a 44 yard bomb to Kevin "Who" Curtis. Holmgren responds by sticking pins in Marshall Faulk voo-doo doll. Mike Martz seen doing the running man. Seattle 27-24
12:30 Shaun Alexander hit by tranquilizer gun. Seattle forced to punt. Holmgren makes sacrifice to Pan, the god of Goats.
14:52 Marc Bulger, channeling St. Hannah (patron saint of comic book super-heroes), leads the Rams down the field with no time outs, setting up Jeff Wilkins who hits a game tying field goal. 27-27.
OT Rams win coin toss. Holmgren electrifies end zone in last ditch effort.
3:02 into OT Bulger hit a random fan ( Shaun McDonald) streaking down the sideline on a 52 yard pass play for a touchdown. Holmgren found in fetal position crying for Binkie his Teddy Bear. Rams win 33-27
2. Alright stand up if you predicted San Diego over Jacksonville, Detroit over Atlanta and New York over Dallas. Keep standing if you also predicted that Detroit, NY Jets and NY Giants would be a combined 11-2 and Tennessee, Green Bay and Kansas City would be a combined 4-10. If your still standing you will be committed to an insane asylum. Coaching matters (witness the Giants finding an offensive line and Detroit finding a clue) but so do injuries and the return of Chad Pennington and Jeremy Shockey can't be overlooked.
3. If there is one permanent fact in the NFL these days (besides Janet Jackson off the Christmas Card list) it is the New England Patroits. 19 straight wins. Cheers all around for Brady's razor sharp accuracy or the offense line that opens holes and gives the QB time. But as the Detroit Pistons showed in the NBA , great defenses, teamwork and turnovers go a long way. While this Cleveland native hates admitting it, Bill Bellichek always has his teams on all cylinders.
The Turn
4. Is there anything more fun (or common) in baseball then second guessing the manager? Was Johan Santanna pulled too early? Should Houston have left Roger Clemens in longer? Did Torre/Francona not use/use their closer/starter/porsche at the right time? Nonetheless if Boston is finally going to get over the CURSE it seems only fitting that they have to go through the Yankees.
The River (random thoughts)
5. If Chaos Theory is correct and the flapping of the butterflies wings in North Dakota produce a hurricane in Indonesia is it possible that by writing this article I am influencing the outcome of a sports game? Do you think the Browns regret not drafting Ben Roethlisberger now or will take a few more losses? After all that debate of taking Phillip Rivers or Eli Manning I find it ironic that its Big Ben playing. How bad is OSU playing, coach Jim Tressel has lost complete confidence in the power of his sweater-vests. Finally, how much more leeway does Joe Gibbs have before Daniel Snyder puts his foot in his mouth.
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Week 5 - Appealing, Delaying, & Repealing Appeals
Can anyone explain to me how Onterrio Smith wanted to "appeal" his drug suspension, then somehow "delayed" his appeal for over a month? But then he repealed his appeal and just accepted the punishment?!? It's all very convenient, as now Michael Bennett is ready to return, but then he injures his knee during practice. I didn't even think you could appeal a drug suspension in the NFL. This is the league that has had a "fashion police" to make sure that everyone's socks are right and that everyone's shirts are tucked in. Yet suddenly, Onterrio is the first one to just say "Hey, my team has a lot of injuries, so I'm just going to play for a few weeks first." I just have this image of Onterrio paying the "Piss Man" from ESPN's "Playmakers" to delay in reporting the results.
I'm glad that's off my chest. Here are the games-
Manwich-Sized Matchup
Tennessee @ Green Bay-
This is a strange game between 2 desperate teams. I'm looking at (2) 1-3 teams that have just been terrible. The Titans got edged out by the Jaguars and then got smacked around by the Chargers. Yes, the Chargers. The Packers started with a bang by beating Carolina, then proceeded to lose every game since showing that they are incapable of playing any run defense. The Titans can run the ball well, and I'm expecting Ahman Green to fumble a couple of more times, so I'm going with the Titans.
Pick: Tennessee
Upset of the Week
Arizona @ San Fran-
It still says that San Fran is a one-point favorite, so I'm going to cash in on the Cardinals for one more week while I still can.
Pick: Arizona
Detroit @ Atlanta-
This could actually be a good game. You gotta believe in Coach Mariucci... to keep it close. I can't even imagine how good the Falcons would be if they used WR Michael Jenkins. If anyone has ESPN football- The Videogame, you know that Jenkins is incredible.
Pick: Atlanta
NY Giants @ Dallas-
OK, Kurt Warner. You showed me that there was no Krypton in Green Bay. I still don't believe it though. The Packers defensive players, that Warner beat last week, wouldn't even compete w/ Dallas's local pee-wee defensive team.
Pick: Dallas
Minnesota @ Houston-
Houston has climbed back to 2-2. But stopping Minnesota is difficult, no matter whether Onterrio Smith, Moe Williams, or Marty McFly is in at running back.
Pick: Minnesota
Oakland @ Indy-
I wonder if Jerry Rice has any kids, because then we could have our first father-son combo on the field at the same time.
Pick: Indy
Miami @ New England-
The best news the Dolphins got this week is that Ricky Williams wants to play again, meaning they might be able to trade Ricky's rights for something. Too bad that doesn't help the Dolphins on the field, as they are already on a 4th string RB.
Pick: New England
Tampa Bay @ New Orleans-
Chris Simms is starting his first game. Phil Simms could broadcast this game. Father-son broadcast-player relationships don't work well. Just look at Bill Walton calling some Arizona basketall games w/ Luke Walton. Oh wait, that's just because Bill Walton is a poor broadcaster in general.
Top Bill Walton quote: "The team that can score the most points will win."
Pick: New Orleans
Cleveland @ Pittsburgh-
What were the odds that the Browns could get into 1st place by winning this game? This pains me to say it, it pains me to predict it, but I don't think the Browns have the Steelers playbook (unlike last week against Washington).
Pick: Pittsburgh
Buffalo @ NY Jets-
J-E-T-S! Jets! Jets! Jets!
Pick: NY Jets
Jacksonville @ San Diego-
I am refusing to believe in these Chargers. The Jag defense will put the clamps down.
Pick: Jacksonville
Carolina @ Denver-
I have no idea which Carolina team will show up. I don't think I've picked any of their games right so far.
Pick: Denver
St. Louis @ Seattle-
The only way this division gets interesting is if Coach Martz finds a way to win. Martz is just too illogical and crazy at this point to get it done.
Pick: Seattle
Baltimore @ Washington-
So, the Ravens had to lose a game w/o Deion. Had to give him some value. Meanwhile, Portis and the Redskins were complaining that the Browns "knew all the plays" last week. Doesn't that just mean they need to expand the playbook beyond on the 8 plays available in the 1991 version of Tecmo Bowl?
Pick: Baltimore
Last Week: 9-5
Season: 39-21
Manwich Matchup: 1-3 (damn the unpredictable Panthers)
Upset Special: 3-1 (thank you Cardinals)
I'm glad that's off my chest. Here are the games-
Manwich-Sized Matchup
Tennessee @ Green Bay-
This is a strange game between 2 desperate teams. I'm looking at (2) 1-3 teams that have just been terrible. The Titans got edged out by the Jaguars and then got smacked around by the Chargers. Yes, the Chargers. The Packers started with a bang by beating Carolina, then proceeded to lose every game since showing that they are incapable of playing any run defense. The Titans can run the ball well, and I'm expecting Ahman Green to fumble a couple of more times, so I'm going with the Titans.
Pick: Tennessee
Upset of the Week
Arizona @ San Fran-
It still says that San Fran is a one-point favorite, so I'm going to cash in on the Cardinals for one more week while I still can.
Pick: Arizona
Detroit @ Atlanta-
This could actually be a good game. You gotta believe in Coach Mariucci... to keep it close. I can't even imagine how good the Falcons would be if they used WR Michael Jenkins. If anyone has ESPN football- The Videogame, you know that Jenkins is incredible.
Pick: Atlanta
NY Giants @ Dallas-
OK, Kurt Warner. You showed me that there was no Krypton in Green Bay. I still don't believe it though. The Packers defensive players, that Warner beat last week, wouldn't even compete w/ Dallas's local pee-wee defensive team.
Pick: Dallas
Minnesota @ Houston-
Houston has climbed back to 2-2. But stopping Minnesota is difficult, no matter whether Onterrio Smith, Moe Williams, or Marty McFly is in at running back.
Pick: Minnesota
Oakland @ Indy-
I wonder if Jerry Rice has any kids, because then we could have our first father-son combo on the field at the same time.
Pick: Indy
Miami @ New England-
The best news the Dolphins got this week is that Ricky Williams wants to play again, meaning they might be able to trade Ricky's rights for something. Too bad that doesn't help the Dolphins on the field, as they are already on a 4th string RB.
Pick: New England
Tampa Bay @ New Orleans-
Chris Simms is starting his first game. Phil Simms could broadcast this game. Father-son broadcast-player relationships don't work well. Just look at Bill Walton calling some Arizona basketall games w/ Luke Walton. Oh wait, that's just because Bill Walton is a poor broadcaster in general.
Top Bill Walton quote: "The team that can score the most points will win."
Pick: New Orleans
Cleveland @ Pittsburgh-
What were the odds that the Browns could get into 1st place by winning this game? This pains me to say it, it pains me to predict it, but I don't think the Browns have the Steelers playbook (unlike last week against Washington).
Pick: Pittsburgh
Buffalo @ NY Jets-
J-E-T-S! Jets! Jets! Jets!
Pick: NY Jets
Jacksonville @ San Diego-
I am refusing to believe in these Chargers. The Jag defense will put the clamps down.
Pick: Jacksonville
Carolina @ Denver-
I have no idea which Carolina team will show up. I don't think I've picked any of their games right so far.
Pick: Denver
St. Louis @ Seattle-
The only way this division gets interesting is if Coach Martz finds a way to win. Martz is just too illogical and crazy at this point to get it done.
Pick: Seattle
Baltimore @ Washington-
So, the Ravens had to lose a game w/o Deion. Had to give him some value. Meanwhile, Portis and the Redskins were complaining that the Browns "knew all the plays" last week. Doesn't that just mean they need to expand the playbook beyond on the 8 plays available in the 1991 version of Tecmo Bowl?
Pick: Baltimore
Last Week: 9-5
Season: 39-21
Manwich Matchup: 1-3 (damn the unpredictable Panthers)
Upset Special: 3-1 (thank you Cardinals)
Monday, October 04, 2004
Flying High on the 5th Street
Well with week 4 of the NFL is in the books and major league baseball playoffs nearly upon us the sports world is heating up. So without further ado, a few thoughts and observations, courtesy of the 5th street.
The Flop
1. The Eagles are definitly flying high. They have cruised to a 4-0 record this year and have already bested one of the top NFC contenders (Minnesota). What is the secret of their success? It is not the addition of Terrell Owens. Its certainly not Andy Reid's impersonation of Humpty Dumpty. The answer is Rush Limbaugh. It seems like it was only last year when ESPN made one of the biggest blunders in TV history by hiring the Rushbo. If you are what you eat, Rush obviously has devoured a fat racist. Since his criticism of McNabb being overrated, the Eagles are 17-3. McNabb is currently playing his best football of his career while Rush is still working on sit-up number 1. If only Rush would criticize the Browns, perhaps then they could start winning as well.
2. Is there any team more disappointing than the Chiefs? If they lose tonight, no. But a close contender are the Packers. Formerly as constant as the Northern Star, the Packers have fallen flat on their face. Since beating the Colts, the Packers have been unable to do anything right. Ahman "Butters" Green couldn't hold onto the ball if he was covered in glue. The Packer's defense puts up slightly less resistance than a kleenex after the proverbial snot party (one might ask do people really have snot parties and I answer obviously you have never been to any of my family functions). Mike Tice, now armed with the heimlich manuever, should keep the Vikings from choking and on top of the NFC North.
3. While on the subject of disappointing...how about them Cubbies? Now you may say Philadelphia was equally disappointing but you would be completely wrong. Philadelphia did improve their team but forgot to ditch manager Larry Bowa. Bowa couldn't lead his team to a victory at tic-tac-toe over a two year old. The Cubbies, despite being healthy executed a perfect swan dive by losing 7 of their last 10 games. A tough day for Chicago.
The Turn
4. While on the subject of baseball, can anyone really pick out the favorite for the baseball playoffs? In the AL nearly every team has two solid starters, a good closer and a powerful lineup. The exception is of course the Yankees (sans starting pinching) but can anyone ever count out the team that Ruth built and Steinbreinner bought out? Out on the NL side, no team is complete with starting pitching a glaring hole. If I was a betting man, I would state that the Florida Marlins will not repeat as World Series champions and by the fact that they did not make the playoffs, leaves me to believe if its a fairly safe bet.
The River (or random thoughts)
5. Cheers all around for Kurt Warner. The former MVP was pretty much dumped like a JLo husband. However he has bounced back, won the starting qb job and led the Giants to a startling 3-1 record. Also cheers all around for Dennis Green. Football's doormat (the Arizona Cardinals) have played every team tough so far this year and it paid off Sunday with Arizona's first victory. Here in Columbus political signs seem to be being stolen left and right off lawns. Ah democracy truly brings out the best in people. Finally the 5th street is all aboard the Kyle Orton for Heisman trophy train. Damn is he good.
The Flop
1. The Eagles are definitly flying high. They have cruised to a 4-0 record this year and have already bested one of the top NFC contenders (Minnesota). What is the secret of their success? It is not the addition of Terrell Owens. Its certainly not Andy Reid's impersonation of Humpty Dumpty. The answer is Rush Limbaugh. It seems like it was only last year when ESPN made one of the biggest blunders in TV history by hiring the Rushbo. If you are what you eat, Rush obviously has devoured a fat racist. Since his criticism of McNabb being overrated, the Eagles are 17-3. McNabb is currently playing his best football of his career while Rush is still working on sit-up number 1. If only Rush would criticize the Browns, perhaps then they could start winning as well.
2. Is there any team more disappointing than the Chiefs? If they lose tonight, no. But a close contender are the Packers. Formerly as constant as the Northern Star, the Packers have fallen flat on their face. Since beating the Colts, the Packers have been unable to do anything right. Ahman "Butters" Green couldn't hold onto the ball if he was covered in glue. The Packer's defense puts up slightly less resistance than a kleenex after the proverbial snot party (one might ask do people really have snot parties and I answer obviously you have never been to any of my family functions). Mike Tice, now armed with the heimlich manuever, should keep the Vikings from choking and on top of the NFC North.
3. While on the subject of disappointing...how about them Cubbies? Now you may say Philadelphia was equally disappointing but you would be completely wrong. Philadelphia did improve their team but forgot to ditch manager Larry Bowa. Bowa couldn't lead his team to a victory at tic-tac-toe over a two year old. The Cubbies, despite being healthy executed a perfect swan dive by losing 7 of their last 10 games. A tough day for Chicago.
The Turn
4. While on the subject of baseball, can anyone really pick out the favorite for the baseball playoffs? In the AL nearly every team has two solid starters, a good closer and a powerful lineup. The exception is of course the Yankees (sans starting pinching) but can anyone ever count out the team that Ruth built and Steinbreinner bought out? Out on the NL side, no team is complete with starting pitching a glaring hole. If I was a betting man, I would state that the Florida Marlins will not repeat as World Series champions and by the fact that they did not make the playoffs, leaves me to believe if its a fairly safe bet.
The River (or random thoughts)
5. Cheers all around for Kurt Warner. The former MVP was pretty much dumped like a JLo husband. However he has bounced back, won the starting qb job and led the Giants to a startling 3-1 record. Also cheers all around for Dennis Green. Football's doormat (the Arizona Cardinals) have played every team tough so far this year and it paid off Sunday with Arizona's first victory. Here in Columbus political signs seem to be being stolen left and right off lawns. Ah democracy truly brings out the best in people. Finally the 5th street is all aboard the Kyle Orton for Heisman trophy train. Damn is he good.
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Week 4 - The Road Team Always Wins
Last week, 7 road teams won out of the 14 games played. This week, it's extremely likely (or at least I think it is likely) that 8 road teams could win, and I even have Arizona winning at home. Whatever happened to home field advantage? Are there just not enough crazies out there like in Cleveland and Oakland to make a home field advantage? Not really sure. And yes, I realize it's hard to have a home field advantage in Cleveland this year with 1 out of every 3 players injured each week.
On to the games...
Manwich-sized Matchup:
Atlanta @ Carolina-
The Falcons are undefeated, but they've only faced San Fran, St. Louis, and Arizona. For those who are slow let me summarize--- the Falcons have yet to venture outside of the pathetic NFC West, and this is certainly their first test. The Falcon defense has looked incredible, but I'm curious to see what happens against Delhomme and Foster. Once again, I have to go with the home team, which is now 3-0 in the Manwich-Sized Matchup.
Pick: Carolina
Upset of the Week:
New Orleans @ Arizona-
Most people would pick Arizona to go 0-16. But I saw a lot of positives in their 6-3 loss to the Falcons last week. Their defense is actually above average. The Saints defense is a lot worse than the Falcons, so I'm sure Arizona can score more than 3 points. In addition, the game is in Arizona where it is really hot, and this reminds me of how Arizona shocked Green Bay at home last year on an unseasonably warm day.
Pick: Arizona
New England @ Buffalo-
Both of these teams are coming off of byes. Give Belichick 2 weeks to disect your team and you can ensure a big fat "L."
Pick: New England
Oakland @ Houston-
Well, my 2004 Sleeper Team, the Houston Texans finally won a game. This will be yet another shootout. Let's just go with the home team.
Pick: Houston
Cincinnati @ Pittsburgh-
I think it's becoming pretty aparent that Bengals coach Marvin Lewis didn't actually COACH the 2000 Baltimore Ravens defense; he just inherited some fantastic defensive talent. We've all played Madden. Those guys had incredible rankings! When Lewis went to the Redskins for one year under Spurrier (everyone forgets this even happened) the Redskins defense stunk. Just like the Bengals. I'm noticing a trend here. Maybe Lewis should trade for GM Ozzie Newsome.
Pick: Pittsburgh
Indy @ Jacksonville-
This should be a great game- on paper. A stout defense against the best offense in the league. Peyton Manning threw for 320 yards and 5 touchdowns in the 1st half last week. The other side of the ball is a problem. Even if the Jags play good defense and get lucky like the Pats did in Week 1, there's no way the Jags are scoring over 24 points to win the game.
Pick: Indy
NY Giants @ Green Bay-
Point: Kurt Warner has regained his Superman powers! All the pollution in St. Louis resulted in increased amounts of Kryptonite in the water and Warner became useless. The change of scenery has been great for his thumb, his x-ray vision, and his speed (he ran for a TD last week).
Counterpoint: Warner was playing against the Browns last week and their backup CBs.
Pick: Green Bay
Philadelphia @ Chicago-
Did you know that THE Ohio State University Alumnus Craig Krenzel was only one more injury away from seeing action last Sunday?
Pick: Philadelphia
Washington @ Cleveland-
During the day off on Monday, 2 Browns pulled their groins while raking the leaves during filming of a United Way commerical. They gave it all for their communities.
Pick: Washington
Denver @ Tampa Bay-
Wow. I was really wrong about Tampa Bay finding a way to win last week. Oh well.
Pick: Denver
NY Jets @ Miami-
A great rivalry game, where anyone can win. Unless you have a coach w/ a really large moustache that screams, "Call me Magnum, PI."
Pick: NY Jets
Tennessee @ San Diego-
Can someone please tell Steve McNair that if he spends 2 nights in the hospital he doesn't have to play that week against the lowly Chargers? I think he's proven his toughness too many times already. And they said Brett Favre was hooked on painkillers 6 years ago, I can't even imagine what McNair is on. ("Alex, I'll take 'Mr. Ed's' Favorite Painkillers for $2000...")
Pick: Tennessee
St. Louis @ San Fran
San Fran continues the march to 2-14.
Pick: St. Louis
KC @ Baltimore
Did you know:
Ravens are: 0-1 -When Deion plays an entire game
Ravens are: 2-0 - When Deion gets injured and is not available for the entire game.
Deion "Past his Prime Time" Sanders should get the point- the Ravens are better off without him.
Pick: Baltimore
NOTE: To answer a popular question, in all games, I'm only picking the winner. I don't deal w/ the spread.
Last Week: 8-6
Season: 30-16
Manwich Matchup: 1-2 (thank you Colts)
Upset Special: 2-1 (damn Tampa Bay; I'll never trust them again)
On to the games...
Manwich-sized Matchup:
Atlanta @ Carolina-
The Falcons are undefeated, but they've only faced San Fran, St. Louis, and Arizona. For those who are slow let me summarize--- the Falcons have yet to venture outside of the pathetic NFC West, and this is certainly their first test. The Falcon defense has looked incredible, but I'm curious to see what happens against Delhomme and Foster. Once again, I have to go with the home team, which is now 3-0 in the Manwich-Sized Matchup.
Pick: Carolina
Upset of the Week:
New Orleans @ Arizona-
Most people would pick Arizona to go 0-16. But I saw a lot of positives in their 6-3 loss to the Falcons last week. Their defense is actually above average. The Saints defense is a lot worse than the Falcons, so I'm sure Arizona can score more than 3 points. In addition, the game is in Arizona where it is really hot, and this reminds me of how Arizona shocked Green Bay at home last year on an unseasonably warm day.
Pick: Arizona
New England @ Buffalo-
Both of these teams are coming off of byes. Give Belichick 2 weeks to disect your team and you can ensure a big fat "L."
Pick: New England
Oakland @ Houston-
Well, my 2004 Sleeper Team, the Houston Texans finally won a game. This will be yet another shootout. Let's just go with the home team.
Pick: Houston
Cincinnati @ Pittsburgh-
I think it's becoming pretty aparent that Bengals coach Marvin Lewis didn't actually COACH the 2000 Baltimore Ravens defense; he just inherited some fantastic defensive talent. We've all played Madden. Those guys had incredible rankings! When Lewis went to the Redskins for one year under Spurrier (everyone forgets this even happened) the Redskins defense stunk. Just like the Bengals. I'm noticing a trend here. Maybe Lewis should trade for GM Ozzie Newsome.
Pick: Pittsburgh
Indy @ Jacksonville-
This should be a great game- on paper. A stout defense against the best offense in the league. Peyton Manning threw for 320 yards and 5 touchdowns in the 1st half last week. The other side of the ball is a problem. Even if the Jags play good defense and get lucky like the Pats did in Week 1, there's no way the Jags are scoring over 24 points to win the game.
Pick: Indy
NY Giants @ Green Bay-
Point: Kurt Warner has regained his Superman powers! All the pollution in St. Louis resulted in increased amounts of Kryptonite in the water and Warner became useless. The change of scenery has been great for his thumb, his x-ray vision, and his speed (he ran for a TD last week).
Counterpoint: Warner was playing against the Browns last week and their backup CBs.
Pick: Green Bay
Philadelphia @ Chicago-
Did you know that THE Ohio State University Alumnus Craig Krenzel was only one more injury away from seeing action last Sunday?
Pick: Philadelphia
Washington @ Cleveland-
During the day off on Monday, 2 Browns pulled their groins while raking the leaves during filming of a United Way commerical. They gave it all for their communities.
Pick: Washington
Denver @ Tampa Bay-
Wow. I was really wrong about Tampa Bay finding a way to win last week. Oh well.
Pick: Denver
NY Jets @ Miami-
A great rivalry game, where anyone can win. Unless you have a coach w/ a really large moustache that screams, "Call me Magnum, PI."
Pick: NY Jets
Tennessee @ San Diego-
Can someone please tell Steve McNair that if he spends 2 nights in the hospital he doesn't have to play that week against the lowly Chargers? I think he's proven his toughness too many times already. And they said Brett Favre was hooked on painkillers 6 years ago, I can't even imagine what McNair is on. ("Alex, I'll take 'Mr. Ed's' Favorite Painkillers for $2000...")
Pick: Tennessee
St. Louis @ San Fran
San Fran continues the march to 2-14.
Pick: St. Louis
KC @ Baltimore
Did you know:
Ravens are: 0-1 -When Deion plays an entire game
Ravens are: 2-0 - When Deion gets injured and is not available for the entire game.
Deion "Past his Prime Time" Sanders should get the point- the Ravens are better off without him.
Pick: Baltimore
NOTE: To answer a popular question, in all games, I'm only picking the winner. I don't deal w/ the spread.
Last Week: 8-6
Season: 30-16
Manwich Matchup: 1-2 (thank you Colts)
Upset Special: 2-1 (damn Tampa Bay; I'll never trust them again)
Monday, September 27, 2004
Substance Not Style for the 5th Street
The mighty lords of cosmos have put things back in line. Yes, the Detoit Lions have lost. If they had beaten the Eagles I was heading towards the nearest bomb shelter, waiting for the apocalypse. But all is not right and this blogger (apparently there's over 2 million of us in the USA alone) wants to point out a few of them.
The Flop
1. One thing that needs to be addressed is politics. Yes its a sports column so I'm going to use a sports analogy and it entails substance versus style. In today's politial campaigns and media- style trumps all. "Vote for Bush, he has leadership qualities." "John Kerry shares your values ." another commercial sang. Think about how people evaluate head coaches in the NFL and you'll quickly see how silly those kinds of comments go. Bill Bellichek is many things, charismatic is not one of them. A popularity contest between him and a pet rock, the pet rock is getting the nod. But how many people are calling for his firing because of his lack of charisma? I'm pretty sure Tom Coughlin is wound so tight he fines his mother if she's late to a family function. But if he makes the playoffs, all of his personal shortcomings will be overlooked. In the NFL you don't see a head coach pleading for his job with his wife at his side because its the substance and results that counts, not the image. Ultimately candidates should be evaluated on results and policy choices - no different than coaches are. The next time someone tells you that someone should be elected president on purely on charisma, think about the Patroits and if they would have been better off with a charismatic coach.
2. On the topic of substance over style, how about those Jaguars? Pretty they are not. But they have given up only 28 points all year long. They have two mountains of men in the middle that crush opposing teams running games. They have a pass rush that would sack a QB, even if he were protected by barbed wire. Oh and Mr. Leftwhich is finding a way to win in the clutch. They beat the Titans and are quickly building an impressive resume for the playoffs. The question remains though, can they beat the Colts (although will they have a stadium after all these hurricanes may be an equally important question).
3. For a team that represents style over substance I turn to the Atlanta Michael Vicks. Don't get me wrong Michael Vick is the most exciting player in football. I'm pretty certain Michael Vick can score from anywhere on the football field and possibly from the Men's Room. But the key word is "can". Yesterday they edged the 0-2 Cardinals, by the score 6-3 ,when Arizona's Shaun King hit into a double play. Beating the Cardinals by 3 points does not bode well for future match ups against the NFC elite teams.
The Turn
4. The AL West is a close race. One game seperates two teams. Two games seperates three teams. And does anyone care? Hello? Is this thing on? Meanwhile off the East Coast Boston and New York continue to garner the headline. BoSox cut Yankees lead to 5 games , nation hold's collective breadth. Sure I realize everyone east of the Missippi River is fast asleep by the time the AL West games are over but a little respect please.
5. The River (random thoughts)
Is it just me or is the Brown's season already begining to approximate the proverbial "runaway train". A thrashing by the Giants? I'm not sure crack offensive coordinator Terry Robskie could guide an offense through a maze on the side of a Happy Meal let alone into the end zone. I'm glancing over and Peter King's column over at SI continues to steal my ideas. Don't think I'll forget this, Pete. Brett Favre v. Peyton Manning lived up to everything that was it billed to be. I got to believe that both defensive coordinator's were drinking heavily by the 4rth quarter. Finally apparently the secret to Mike Nugent's field goal skills is General Tso's Chicken. Who knew?
The Flop
1. One thing that needs to be addressed is politics. Yes its a sports column so I'm going to use a sports analogy and it entails substance versus style. In today's politial campaigns and media- style trumps all. "Vote for Bush, he has leadership qualities." "John Kerry shares your values ." another commercial sang. Think about how people evaluate head coaches in the NFL and you'll quickly see how silly those kinds of comments go. Bill Bellichek is many things, charismatic is not one of them. A popularity contest between him and a pet rock, the pet rock is getting the nod. But how many people are calling for his firing because of his lack of charisma? I'm pretty sure Tom Coughlin is wound so tight he fines his mother if she's late to a family function. But if he makes the playoffs, all of his personal shortcomings will be overlooked. In the NFL you don't see a head coach pleading for his job with his wife at his side because its the substance and results that counts, not the image. Ultimately candidates should be evaluated on results and policy choices - no different than coaches are. The next time someone tells you that someone should be elected president on purely on charisma, think about the Patroits and if they would have been better off with a charismatic coach.
2. On the topic of substance over style, how about those Jaguars? Pretty they are not. But they have given up only 28 points all year long. They have two mountains of men in the middle that crush opposing teams running games. They have a pass rush that would sack a QB, even if he were protected by barbed wire. Oh and Mr. Leftwhich is finding a way to win in the clutch. They beat the Titans and are quickly building an impressive resume for the playoffs. The question remains though, can they beat the Colts (although will they have a stadium after all these hurricanes may be an equally important question).
3. For a team that represents style over substance I turn to the Atlanta Michael Vicks. Don't get me wrong Michael Vick is the most exciting player in football. I'm pretty certain Michael Vick can score from anywhere on the football field and possibly from the Men's Room. But the key word is "can". Yesterday they edged the 0-2 Cardinals, by the score 6-3 ,when Arizona's Shaun King hit into a double play. Beating the Cardinals by 3 points does not bode well for future match ups against the NFC elite teams.
The Turn
4. The AL West is a close race. One game seperates two teams. Two games seperates three teams. And does anyone care? Hello? Is this thing on? Meanwhile off the East Coast Boston and New York continue to garner the headline. BoSox cut Yankees lead to 5 games , nation hold's collective breadth. Sure I realize everyone east of the Missippi River is fast asleep by the time the AL West games are over but a little respect please.
5. The River (random thoughts)
Is it just me or is the Brown's season already begining to approximate the proverbial "runaway train". A thrashing by the Giants? I'm not sure crack offensive coordinator Terry Robskie could guide an offense through a maze on the side of a Happy Meal let alone into the end zone. I'm glancing over and Peter King's column over at SI continues to steal my ideas. Don't think I'll forget this, Pete. Brett Favre v. Peyton Manning lived up to everything that was it billed to be. I got to believe that both defensive coordinator's were drinking heavily by the 4rth quarter. Finally apparently the secret to Mike Nugent's field goal skills is General Tso's Chicken. Who knew?
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Week 3 - Injuries Galore
Injuries piled up all across the league last week. It was just a gruesome Sunday and fantasy owners all across the nation are scrambling- Priest, Deuce, Edge, Winslow, and Heap all got seriously injured.
Let’s devote sometime to America's favorite nickel cornerback, Deion “Less than Primetime” Sanders. Deion returned a punt this week for 20 yards! It was amazing, he actually did something productive, but as soon as he got tackled, he ripped off his helmet and started celebrating. Too bad for Deion, but that’s a 15-yard penalty! (Did he not see the KC-Cleveland game in 2002?) Deion then promptly got injured on his next time on defense. Total net gain: 5 yards. I can’t wait until he gets burned for a touchdown!
Let’s get to the games, time is short:
Manwich-sized Matchup:
Green Bay @ Indy-
What a matchup. Favre vs. Manning should get headlines all week. It’s too bad that Favre is half the man he used to be. And it’s too bad that Edgerrin James probably is not playing this week. So we are talking about the amazing Colt passing attack vs. the ground game of Green & Green Bay. I have no idea how this will turn out, so I’ll just go with the home team. Also, home teams are 2-0 in the Manwich-sized matchup (whereas I have been feebly picking the away teams)
Pick: Indy
Upset of the week:
Tampa Bay @ Oakland
Welcome to the rematch of the 2002 Super Bowl participants! Only 20 months ago, Tim Brown, Jerry Rice, Charley Garner, Warren Sapp, and Rich Gannon would have all been closer to their primes. I have no idea why, but I suspect TB will finally get a W. “If not now, when?”
Pick: TB
Chicago @ Minn-
Those Bears sure put on a show last week. Reverses, fake-reverses, fumbles. They tried so hard to let Green Bay back in the game, but Favre just isn’t the same guy he used to be. The Bears had their moment in the sun, now I’m sticking w/ my 2004 NFC Champion Minnesota Vikings.
Pick: Minnesota
Philadelphia @ Detroit-
2 undefeated teams battling it out. I’m expecting TO to get a touchdown and celebrate by grabbing a fan’s hotdog and eating it off of the chest of a cheerleader.
Pick: Philadelphia
Arizona @ Atlanta-
RB Michael Vick tries for 2 straight 100-yard rushing games as his march to surpass Bo Jackson as the greatest video game character of all time continues.
Pick: Atlanta
New Orleans @ St. Louis
This is a really interesting game. The Saints have lots of offense and no defense. Same with the Rams. Oh wait, Deuce got injured. That makes it easy!
Pick: St. Louis
Cleveland @ NY Giants
Wow, a battle between the 1st place Cleveland Browns vs. the 2nd place NY Giants! Sounds like a playoff game, but that’s the beauty of matchups after 2 games. The fans will be on the edge of their seats! The over/under on combined turnovers is 9.
Pick: Cleveland.
Baltimore @ Cincinnati
Could this be the Bengals break-out game? This is an early battle between 2 first-place teams with extremely young QBs. Without Heap, the Bengals could play a 5-5 with one DB and still hold the Ravens to 10 points.
Pick: Cincinnati
Jacksonville @ Tennessee
I have a feeling that Jacksonville will need more than 10 points to win.
Pick: Tennessee
Pittsburgh @ Miami
Let us welcome Miami alum Ben Roethlisberger to the NFL! I really think Miami should win, but this is just going to be an ugly, ugly game. I’ll go with Redhawk mojo over the Wannstedt moustache.
Pick: Pittsburgh
Houston @ KC
The 2 worst defenses in the NFL will face each other in, essentially, an elimination game. KC has to find a way to score 42 points in order to overcome the 35 their defense will give up. The loser of this game will have to look forward to the 2005 NFL draft. Isn't it great that in week 3 we already have teams getting eliminated?
Pick: KC
SF @ Seattle
SF sure has had some close losses (Atl, New Orleans). I think it’s time they had a loss that wasn’t close. Seahawks win by 20. Only 14 more weeks until Coach Erickson is fired!
Pick: Seattle
San Diego @ Denver
Denver is going to be furious after their debacle last weekend.
Pick: Denver
Dallas @ Washington
The Vinny Testaverde farewell tour continues. I was hoping Brunell was healthy to have a rematch of 1998 NFL playoff NY Jet vs. Jacksonville playoff game.
Pick: Dallas
Last Week: 10-6
Season: 22-10
Manwich Matchup: 0-2 (damn those Vikings)
Upset Special: 2-0 (thank you Jacksonville defense!)
Let’s devote sometime to America's favorite nickel cornerback, Deion “Less than Primetime” Sanders. Deion returned a punt this week for 20 yards! It was amazing, he actually did something productive, but as soon as he got tackled, he ripped off his helmet and started celebrating. Too bad for Deion, but that’s a 15-yard penalty! (Did he not see the KC-Cleveland game in 2002?) Deion then promptly got injured on his next time on defense. Total net gain: 5 yards. I can’t wait until he gets burned for a touchdown!
Let’s get to the games, time is short:
Manwich-sized Matchup:
Green Bay @ Indy-
What a matchup. Favre vs. Manning should get headlines all week. It’s too bad that Favre is half the man he used to be. And it’s too bad that Edgerrin James probably is not playing this week. So we are talking about the amazing Colt passing attack vs. the ground game of Green & Green Bay. I have no idea how this will turn out, so I’ll just go with the home team. Also, home teams are 2-0 in the Manwich-sized matchup (whereas I have been feebly picking the away teams)
Pick: Indy
Upset of the week:
Tampa Bay @ Oakland
Welcome to the rematch of the 2002 Super Bowl participants! Only 20 months ago, Tim Brown, Jerry Rice, Charley Garner, Warren Sapp, and Rich Gannon would have all been closer to their primes. I have no idea why, but I suspect TB will finally get a W. “If not now, when?”
Pick: TB
Chicago @ Minn-
Those Bears sure put on a show last week. Reverses, fake-reverses, fumbles. They tried so hard to let Green Bay back in the game, but Favre just isn’t the same guy he used to be. The Bears had their moment in the sun, now I’m sticking w/ my 2004 NFC Champion Minnesota Vikings.
Pick: Minnesota
Philadelphia @ Detroit-
2 undefeated teams battling it out. I’m expecting TO to get a touchdown and celebrate by grabbing a fan’s hotdog and eating it off of the chest of a cheerleader.
Pick: Philadelphia
Arizona @ Atlanta-
RB Michael Vick tries for 2 straight 100-yard rushing games as his march to surpass Bo Jackson as the greatest video game character of all time continues.
Pick: Atlanta
New Orleans @ St. Louis
This is a really interesting game. The Saints have lots of offense and no defense. Same with the Rams. Oh wait, Deuce got injured. That makes it easy!
Pick: St. Louis
Cleveland @ NY Giants
Wow, a battle between the 1st place Cleveland Browns vs. the 2nd place NY Giants! Sounds like a playoff game, but that’s the beauty of matchups after 2 games. The fans will be on the edge of their seats! The over/under on combined turnovers is 9.
Pick: Cleveland.
Baltimore @ Cincinnati
Could this be the Bengals break-out game? This is an early battle between 2 first-place teams with extremely young QBs. Without Heap, the Bengals could play a 5-5 with one DB and still hold the Ravens to 10 points.
Pick: Cincinnati
Jacksonville @ Tennessee
I have a feeling that Jacksonville will need more than 10 points to win.
Pick: Tennessee
Pittsburgh @ Miami
Let us welcome Miami alum Ben Roethlisberger to the NFL! I really think Miami should win, but this is just going to be an ugly, ugly game. I’ll go with Redhawk mojo over the Wannstedt moustache.
Pick: Pittsburgh
Houston @ KC
The 2 worst defenses in the NFL will face each other in, essentially, an elimination game. KC has to find a way to score 42 points in order to overcome the 35 their defense will give up. The loser of this game will have to look forward to the 2005 NFL draft. Isn't it great that in week 3 we already have teams getting eliminated?
Pick: KC
SF @ Seattle
SF sure has had some close losses (Atl, New Orleans). I think it’s time they had a loss that wasn’t close. Seahawks win by 20. Only 14 more weeks until Coach Erickson is fired!
Pick: Seattle
San Diego @ Denver
Denver is going to be furious after their debacle last weekend.
Pick: Denver
Dallas @ Washington
The Vinny Testaverde farewell tour continues. I was hoping Brunell was healthy to have a rematch of 1998 NFL playoff NY Jet vs. Jacksonville playoff game.
Pick: Dallas
Last Week: 10-6
Season: 22-10
Manwich Matchup: 0-2 (damn those Vikings)
Upset Special: 2-0 (thank you Jacksonville defense!)
Monday, September 20, 2004
"Special" Coach guides 5th Street
Hey Now! week 2 of the NFL and week 2 of 5th street. its a good day. before starting out on a sports rant I wanted to go with a quick emmy's update. Arrested Development (best new show on tv) got I think the only network emmy. (and thats including the fact that deadwood didnt get one (best show on tv). Shape up networks . your getting beaten like the proverbial rented mule.
The Flop
1. Kellen Winslow hurt on special teams? I've been trying to come up with a good reason why Butch had K2 on the field. He might block a punt you say. I dont see Michael Vick returning punts, I don't see Tony Gonzalez playing safety, and Eli Manning doesn't work as a car valet. They would all be good at those jobs but guess what the value added to them doing those jobs doesn't overcome the risk of them getting hurt(especially Eli with a car in nyc). There's only solution to this problem and it involves firing Butch Davis and shipping him off to a third world country like Texas.
2. Pundit watch..well as a respected Pundit you immediately need to rank teams and pick the winner for the next 14 games. So who do i got? Well my superbowl pick (KC) is going South faster than a retired Superman off to Florida. KC got beat by Carolina who got beat by Green Bay who lost to Chicago who got beat by Brown University's Choral Society who lost to....Detroit? Ahhh No. Look I remember a simpler time when you got to knock the king off the Mountain in order to be king. New England is the king, they havent lost, they get the nod. Out of the NFC its looking like the winner of Philly and Minnesota will be the annointed one (at least till week 3)
3. Is it just me or have turnovers been ridiculously high this year. There are a few basic laws in the world, gravity pulls things down, beer can solve all the world's problems (or possibly start them), and if you turnover the ball you'll lose. Giants beat Washington, turnovers. Bears beat Green Bay, turnovers. Bush beat Gore , turnovers again, albeit declared by the Supreme Court (I knew I hated instant replay for a reason).
4. The Turn
How do you win at baseball, simple spend money. Basically every team who spent money is/was in the chase for the playoffs. I know the Mets and Baltimore. But the Mets are run by a guy in a monkey suit or a monkey in a human suit and Baltimore spends half its money building moats to protect DC from Montreal. Oh Oakland and Minnesota have won, you say? well thats cause they knew something other teams didnt . They knew about the magic stats like On-Base percentage and slugging percentage. But the cats out of the bag, baby. Boston, LA, etc know the secret formula. So Oakland and Minnesota and all the low spenders need knew secret stats (check out recent peter gammons on this one)...like fielding and base running. but guess what this moving target will be caught and then we'll see really really bad inequality.
5. The River (or random thoughts)
Jacksonville defense is for real. They shut down Denver. And they do it via their line. They will stick around. Seattle has won 2 on the row on the road (as opposed to last year when they won like 1.4 on the road). They will stick around. Tampa Bay players are en masse going to retire and start playing on the football senior circuit halfway through the season. The Indians need to stop playing in the month of September. If football has a network (I'm not sure what theyre covering in June although I would love to see Michael Strahan and Warren Sapp debate salary cap implications) they definitly need a poker network. Next week I'll report live from Columbus on the secret of Mike Nugent...
The Flop
1. Kellen Winslow hurt on special teams? I've been trying to come up with a good reason why Butch had K2 on the field. He might block a punt you say. I dont see Michael Vick returning punts, I don't see Tony Gonzalez playing safety, and Eli Manning doesn't work as a car valet. They would all be good at those jobs but guess what the value added to them doing those jobs doesn't overcome the risk of them getting hurt(especially Eli with a car in nyc). There's only solution to this problem and it involves firing Butch Davis and shipping him off to a third world country like Texas.
2. Pundit watch..well as a respected Pundit you immediately need to rank teams and pick the winner for the next 14 games. So who do i got? Well my superbowl pick (KC) is going South faster than a retired Superman off to Florida. KC got beat by Carolina who got beat by Green Bay who lost to Chicago who got beat by Brown University's Choral Society who lost to....Detroit? Ahhh No. Look I remember a simpler time when you got to knock the king off the Mountain in order to be king. New England is the king, they havent lost, they get the nod. Out of the NFC its looking like the winner of Philly and Minnesota will be the annointed one (at least till week 3)
3. Is it just me or have turnovers been ridiculously high this year. There are a few basic laws in the world, gravity pulls things down, beer can solve all the world's problems (or possibly start them), and if you turnover the ball you'll lose. Giants beat Washington, turnovers. Bears beat Green Bay, turnovers. Bush beat Gore , turnovers again, albeit declared by the Supreme Court (I knew I hated instant replay for a reason).
4. The Turn
How do you win at baseball, simple spend money. Basically every team who spent money is/was in the chase for the playoffs. I know the Mets and Baltimore. But the Mets are run by a guy in a monkey suit or a monkey in a human suit and Baltimore spends half its money building moats to protect DC from Montreal. Oh Oakland and Minnesota have won, you say? well thats cause they knew something other teams didnt . They knew about the magic stats like On-Base percentage and slugging percentage. But the cats out of the bag, baby. Boston, LA, etc know the secret formula. So Oakland and Minnesota and all the low spenders need knew secret stats (check out recent peter gammons on this one)...like fielding and base running. but guess what this moving target will be caught and then we'll see really really bad inequality.
5. The River (or random thoughts)
Jacksonville defense is for real. They shut down Denver. And they do it via their line. They will stick around. Seattle has won 2 on the row on the road (as opposed to last year when they won like 1.4 on the road). They will stick around. Tampa Bay players are en masse going to retire and start playing on the football senior circuit halfway through the season. The Indians need to stop playing in the month of September. If football has a network (I'm not sure what theyre covering in June although I would love to see Michael Strahan and Warren Sapp debate salary cap implications) they definitly need a poker network. Next week I'll report live from Columbus on the secret of Mike Nugent...
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