Say Hello To the New Boss,

Same as the old one. Another year another Mythical championship goes to the SEC. At this point even the most partisian non-SEC have to admit that the combination of demographics, resources, institutional advantages (over-signing, lower admission standards, medical hardship usage to free up roster spots,) gives the SEC an advantage that allows it to lord over the rest of College Football. Perhaps following the 2nd Northern migration things will change but until then all hail the next Southern denizen champion, Auburn.

Fans and Emotions

Since everyone has already has already echoed some of my thoughts I wanted to touch on the reaction. Fortunately or unfortunately Henry Abbot has helped crystallize some of that with a fairly idiotic piece up on ESPN (you can search for the Name the crimes of Lebron piece if you wish I have a pet peeve about linking to stupid stuff). There's lots of stuff I could pick apart but the easiest and I suppose the most emblematic was

But realize, if you're bitter, you're bitter about the format of his expression. Not the contents of his soul. And without clearing the bar in that last sentence, it's a little extreme to call him nasty names on the internet, isn't it?

In this world of ours, you will find some truly terrible people. There are murderers. There are rapists. There are abusers, bullies, polluters, dictators and everything else.

And this is the guy you need to single out? ...

First off all anyone that uses the "yeah but somebody else is worse" is ultimately relying on a weak argumentative crutch. Lebron hasn't committed genocide therefore he doesn't deserve your venom? People's actions stand on their own merit and utilizing "well somebody is worse"argument is weak precisely because no matter what others do, it doesn't change the merits or lack thereof of someone's action. If Abbot wants to argue that it shouldn't get the attention it is fine....but its this attention is what pays his salary.

I don't know whats in the contents of Lebron's soul. I don't know if Lebron knows whats in the contents of his soul. I don't care. It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters were, are, and will be his actions. Its the only window we have as I, Abbott, and most of us lack soul reading abilities.

Fans believe that they share a connection to their teams and to the players on their teams. They imagine a shared identity. That the team's wins are their wins. That the team's losses are their losses. That's what having a team is all about. The logic or appropriateness of that belief is immaterial. It's a fundamental part of being human or at the very least being a fan. So we want to believe that this connection flows both ways, that the passion and interest that allows athletes to live their lavish lifestyles is acknowledged and respected. Lebron's format of expression shows that it's not. He's not the down-to -earth guy loyal guy that we thought he was. His actions were one of self-indulgence and crass indifference to those that had trusted him, to those that had somehow deluded themselves into thinking the cynics weren't right. To dismiss how he handled things and focus on other things is to ultimately fail to understand what being a fan is about. At least for me. Cheering madly for grown men who can put oversized balls into a metal hoops isn't something I can get excited about or single out as worthy of attention. It's not something that has societal benefit like a teacher for a student or a doctor helping fight cancer. Cheering madly for someone who I identify with? Cheering madly for someone that allows us to project our expectations and hopes? Of course. Liking someone whose actions demonstrated at best an non-nonchalance to those that fueled his fame and wealth? Why would I? What's in his soul doesn't matter. As MJ aptly put it "Lebron was never different or special" because his actions demonstrated it. His expression of decision demonstrated. And that's more than enough reason to raise the ire of fans because it goes to the heart of what being a fan is about.

Cavs v. Celts: Game 5 Recap

What's that? We're supposed to call fouls on Boston? I better check with the boss on that one.

BSD goes to Game 2

So the editor calls and says thanks to the high sales and hits BSD has raised enough money to send 3 intrepid reporters to cover the ALDS. Luckily the Cleveland office was available so Gutsy, Laz and myself packed up our bags and headed over to corner of Carnegie and Ontario to cover Game 2 of Yankees and the Tribe. Laz (who moonlights as a traffic cop, child beater, astronaut and a porn star) and I joined the masses on the trek to the Jake. We crossed over Rock n Roll Boulevard and could tell the fans were jazzed. The out of town fans were getting razzed, the giant statue of Bob Feller was decked out in charming one piece and everyone was dropping beers like it might be their last. One has to remember that growing up in a dying city leaves one a little fatalistic so self-medication is always must.

Due to some miscommunication apparently you need press passes to get into the press box so instead we were given seats in the upper deck in right field. This would actually work out in our favor later in the game especially because its nice getting the common man's view of things to really be able to report. Laz also entered a hot dog eating contest for the same reason.

Pettite and Carmona pitched gems. Carmona gave up an early bomb before settling down doing a remarkable impersonation of Josh Beckett from his Game 1 performance. Pettite wasn't quite as dominating but anytime the Indians got into scoring position he shut them down or used his mind control powers to cause the Indian baserunners/coaches into a vegetative state.

Now I've never been to a playoff game before so I can't compare it but the strain and stress of being hyper juiced, making Yankees sucks chants and helping that guy that had 10 beers through 7 innings was beginning to take its toll. It was then that Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain (who from what I'm told is the Yankees version of Tim Tebow) marched onto the field to close the door on the Tribe. Chamberlain who I just prefer to call the Duke, has been unhittable with an over powering fastball and neon claws. However, Moses, who sits in bleachers next to the drummer guy (who btw greeted the fans at the Gates), raised his hands and demanded that Torre let his people go. Torre refused so Moses unleashed a plague of midges and locusts on their first born. Gutsy wondered if Cleveland has some villain that controlled bugs that was responsible but that's just preposterous. Obviously it was Charlton Heston in full Moses get up.

Chamberlain might be tough but he wasn't ready for an ugly planet, a bug planet that was the pitcher's mound (reporter's notebook, the bugs really stayed on the field and outside of Jeter's swatting and the spray down session we in the upper decks had no idea there even were any bugs). The midges swarmed Joba, punching him in the groin, getting in his eyes and possibly discussing his sister's choice in panties. Wild pitches and Grady's speed added up to a tied score. To celebrate Slider got the Rally Pie cheer going and hung a Yankee in effigy. Or I assume it was a dummy, MJ may have volunteered Kyle Farnsworth for sacrifice.

The Indians eventually would counter with their own super rookie Rafi "Scarecrow" Perez. The Scarecrow threw another 2 scoreless innings setting the stage for Willie Mays Hays err Kenny Lofton to get on base. A few days later (for such a low scoring game, it went on forever, I'm still not sure how.) the bases were loaded, there were two outs, no time outs and Jake Taylor err Pronk was facing a full court press. The entire stadium was up on their feet, screaming for free Jack Daniel's shots and/or an Indians hit with runners in scoring position. Everyone except my dad, who looked away as to not jinx the Tribe. With that extra bit of luck, Hafner hit a rifle shot into the outfield to win the game. The fans, or the ones wearing the racist garb, went crazy. Cheers erupted, high fives were delivered with terrific force with your neighbors, and I might have accidentally impregnated this married woman sitting below me (if the husband is reading this, that was totally my bad, but in my defense we got caught up in the moment).

Wow just wow. And you know what, it means next to nothing as the series goes on to New York for Game 3, where our own BSD New York branch will be covering it, possibly armed with baseball bats. Until then.....

Its always darkest....

before you get hit on the head with a wrench. Then it gets darker.

h/t Dawgs by Nature

Honestly, how could the Browns humanly get worse? Name a more dysfunctional franchise? Go on...I dare you...

Happy New Year to all you assholes with a professional football team

--Totally Not Bitter