Showing posts with label Young and the Restless. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Young and the Restless. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Week 3: Injuries, Old QB's and the Toilet Bowl


This morning we awoke to the news that in a 1990s retro decision Trent Green is now the starter for the STL Rams.  Green, pictured below being carted off the field, is famous for... hmmmm, injuries.  Granted the entire state of Ohio is in a state of mourning over the play (or lack thereof) by the Bungals and the Steamers (more on that later), but the Rams are last in the league in total defense, second to last in total offense (behind before mentioned Steamers), last in rushing yards, and 27th in passing yards.  This team is terrible and benching Bulgar is not the answer.  The Rams have not had a decent offense line since the days of Marshall Faulk.  Trent Green is being thrown to the wolves and I hope he survives the season.
 


The Rams continued the shake-up by making changes in the secondary.  This news is surprising.  The Rams have a secondary?  Mighty Mike already ranted about the idiots in charge of this team and he is right.

In breaking news, Matt Milen was fired by Detroit.  The article states: "The 0-3 start dropped Millen to 31-84 overall, giving the Lions at least 10 more losses than any other NFL team over the past seven-plus seasons." For those who are curious, here are selected draft picks of the Millen regime: Joey Harrington, Charles Rodgers, Roy Williams, Roy Rodgers, Mike Williams, and Jose Oquendo.  I hear the Rams need help!!

Midwest football is in a state of total disarray.  The Colts look mortal and the Bears found another way to lose last week as Griese enacted revenge upon his old team.  In unrelated news, this post about the Raiders is funny.

The Toilet Bowl!  This week the 0-3 Steamers face off against 0-3 Cincy.  Gutsy is going with Cincy but I'm going to put it on the line this week and pick the Steamers.  Romeo "the decider" told the media he would start Derek Anderson ahead of Brady Quinn.  What do you think? Honestly, this is the right move.  The Steamers are 0-3 (0-2 in conference), play one of the toughest schedules, and injuries rocked both lines.  If Romeo's clock management skills rivaled his battle toad skills the Browns would still be 0-3.  The Steamers may sneak out of this season with 6 wins but playoff? Nope.  Nothing good can come from throwing Quinn to the wolves (see a pattern emerging?).  Start Anderson and dump him on the trading block.

Week 4 games of note

Jesus at the Jets: Despite the media attention focused on Brett Farve, he looked lousy on Monday night versus the Chargers.  Pick: Jesus

ATL at Carolina: Both teams are 2-1 and fighting for division superiority.  I'm not ready to jump on the ATL band wagon... pick Carolina

Washington @ Dallas: This game will be a real test for the Skins but they do not have the talent to keep up with the high powered Cowsluts.  Pick: Dallas

Philly at Chicago: Wow, the Eagles put a smackdown on the Steelers that transported this author back to smash mouth football or earlier eras.  Pick: Philly

Green Bay at Tampa Bay: The Packers recover from the Cowboy game by beating TB on the road.

The battle of retro QB's continues as Gus "the TD machine" Frerotte takes the Vikings into TN for a match-up against Kerry Collins.  Wow- 1990s memories anyone? Pick: TN

Finally, we will not see Ed Hochuli officiate late in the post season due to discipline by the league for his blown call Week 2.  The good news is that this will give him additional time to feel the deep burn and sculpt his guns in the office.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Week 4 the Young and Restless

In the spirit of Dr Gutsy's week 4 post, here are a few NFL results explained in Soap Oprah
format and plot lines including: wife trading, unexplained brain injuries, anger, jealousy, pregnancy and identity issues.


Matt Leinart/Jesus powered Arizona Cardinals defeat the Steelers.

  • Cardinals coaching staff inform Warner that: if the Cardinals win, he gets Sunday night with one of Leinart's lovely AZ co-eds (but she cannot enjoy it).
  • Leinart is informed that if the Cardinals lose, he must spend the night with Mrs. Warner.
KC defeats SD
  • Herm Edwards is mad because he was born and takes it out on Norv Turner.
Bears attempt 51 passing plays
  • Bears coaching staff suffer a seriously nerve condition creating mistaken identity. Bears think they are a passing team. This condition may be fatal.
Lions are 3-1 and Browns are 2-2. HUH???? Are these cases of jealousy or mistaken identity? Lions post last years total offense in 2nd half and Browns score 24 in one half vs. Cobra.. Soap Oprah's explain this by creating a new wealthy brain surgeon ( Dr. Anderson and Dr. Martz).

NYG post 11 sacks and counting vs. Eagles on SNF
  • Will the real NYG's D please stand up?? They blanked the Skins in the 2nd half and pitch a shut out vs. the Eagles for almost 3 quarters.
  • Eagles in week 3 throw back uniforms (UGLY) scored 42 points in the first half but tonight? 3
MNF football preview
  • Cincy defensive starters will be pregnant (Brady is the father) by halftime.
  • brady takes out a loan for child support