BCS Complexity: So Many Arch-Rivals so little time

So its about 2 weeks left till bowl bids start being passed out like roofies as Sigma Chi party. So where do we stand? First off let's get the ground rules down. There are 10 BCS spots. 6 champions and 4 at large. If a non-major gets the top 12 (Hawaii) they get an at large bid. No conference can have more than 2 BCS bids. If Mark Mangino eats more than 4 chicken fried steaks Kansas gets a free bid. There are also a number of other crazy rules but if I revealed them I'd probably have to commit sepku. By in large the BCS has avoided giving at large bids to teams that lose their last game. So what do we have?

National Championship Game
1) LSU just needs to win out and they have the spot. They've looked shaky since Week 1 and they still have to face the Nut-less Razorbacks and either the Lady Vols or UGA in the SEC Championship (to be held on Bourbon street). Given Miles covetous eyes on the Michigan job this wouldn't be surprising......

2) Kansas or Missouri - With Oklahoma's loss the Big 12 has two candidates left for the beauty contest. The Civil War battle at Arrowhead will decide the birth to the Big 12 Championship. Its also an elimination game for any BCS bowl as short of another OU choke job Texas has an at large BCS spot locked up. However a nonconcussed Sam Bradford and OU could still eliminate either in the Big 12 championship game. If OU trips again well then the Longhorns get the shot at playing spoiler in the Big 12 Championship game.

3) West Virginia - Talk up Tebow all you want but nobody runs the spread option like Pat White. A victory over UConn (yes UConn) and the battle in the backyard (The Mustache of Pittsburgh) and a loss by the top 3 and they are in. A victory for UConn btw means that gulp UConn takes the Big East BCS spot.

4. tOSU - Yes the Sweatervests despite only 2 passes in the second half clinched the Big 10 title behind Vernon Gholston's arms and Beanie Wells legs. They're currently slotted for a Rose Bowl bid unless both LSU and West Virginia lose.

Gholston's arms shut Hart's mouth permanently at the college level

Other Spots:
ACC - Will be decided by acChampionship game between V-Tech or Virgina (who have their own rivalry game to settle the score) and Boston College. The winner is off to the Orange Bowl.

Pac 10: Should be decided by the winner of Arizona State and USC (assuming the winner can take care of their arch-rival the following week). That winner is certainly off to the Rose Bowl. Of course if Oregon pulls off the miracle and beats its arch-rival and USC beats Arizona State then Oregon and their ACL-less Dennis Dixon are in the Rose Bowl.

At Larges - Hawaii has a shot at one (and oddly enough Boise State does too) for the coveted David v. Goliath bowl, Texas and Georgia have momentum (and I'm assuming not playing in a conference championship games) . However scanning the BCS there's a pretty big hole for that last spot. The loser of Arizona State and USC has a shot (the winner probably getting the Pac 10 Championship slot). However I'll pull a small shocker out of my umm hat and say Illinois (yes the Fighting Alumni) might get that last spot.

Got all that?

I just wanted a picture showing Saban in pain. Is that wrong?