Friday, June 16, 2006

Cheers and Jeers: Canadian Cocktail Edition


Today's cheering and jeering is directed to our friendly neighbors up north. Canadians are like the librarians of the world: polite, friendly and above all quiet. However Canada has had a number of great exports that we here in the US enjoy. Of all their exports Cheers and Jeers believes that their number 1 sports export is….the playoff beard. Now for those that are unaware the playoff beard is a show of solidarity were all involved in the playoffs don't shave until they win the championship or are eliminated. Hence for us casual observers of hockey, we can always tell what round of Lord Stanley's Playoff we're in based on beard length. Little known fact is that the playoff beard originated as a sign of solidarity with the Great Lumberjack strike of 1894 (Lumberjacks trying to collectively bargain for hard currency as opposed to flannel shirts). As time has gone on players continue the tradition of not shaving every playoffs. Long straggly beards….now that’s a reason to cheer.

Cheers: To the Toronto Blue Jays. Now I realize that according to ESPN baseball is only played in either Boston or New York but the once proud Blue Jay organization is back baby. Boasting a 37-29 record, Toronto has quietly maneuvered itself to being only one game behind the Yankees. Now I'm not sure if Toronto can pass by the 800 pound gorillas but what a story it would be the Blue Jays could rekindle some past glory.

Jeers: To Ozzie Guillen for his very un-Canadian like actions. Captain Emotional Intelligence himself berated a rookie pitcher in the dugout for not plunking an opposing player. Its one thing to teach a rookie about the necronomica or whatever ancient text baseball goes by but publicly showing up a player is poor form. Certainly not something a Canadian would ever do.

Cheers: To Canada's former benevolent ruler…England. England clinched a berth into the next round of the playoff when it defeated Trinidad and Tobago. The best part was that Peter Crouch scored a goal. Why is that a good thing? If you haven't experience the pure joy of watching a 6'7 Englishman doing the robot in celebration then you just haven't lived.

Cheers: To Shameless Plugs. A friend of mine is the line-producer for the new movie: American Standard. Check out the trailer here and go watch it when its released in the fall.

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