Ingredients: - 1 shot Jägermeister
- 1 shot Grenadine
- 5 oz Orange juice
1. I'm sorry that every time I see Cobra Commander the first thing that pops into my head is that Billick is carefully deciding if he looks better siloutted from the right or left side. I'm sure at the end of the day Billick is much less egotistical and slightly more stable than lets say the manager from the South Side of Chicago. And no jury in any world would force be to apologize to Captain Choke himself.
2. I'm sorry that my own brand of malaise causes my teams to lose. I put the Cards recent slide directly as a result of my rooting for them. The Cards currently sit 1/2 game away from a collapse of epic proportions. The Houston "We only play in the second half of the season anyway" is pushing Saint Louis to the brink and would arguably possess the best pitching rotation in the playoffs.
3. I'm sorry that my own brand of malaise allowed for a law that will allow for the suspension of habeas corpus for Gutsy. I realize that the pressure of getting his picks right or face waterboarding is getting to him and I swear I'm very sorry for it.
4. I apologize that I have but this humble Online Magazine to call for Maurice Carthon's firing. Sir, fat, drunk and stupid is no way to approach being an offensive coordinator.
Alright enough saying I'm sorry, time for a little cheering and jeering
Cheers To Auburn beating the old ball coach in Steve Spurrior. The SEC has I think really has been overlooked by the voters and given the high quality of teams down there this year I'm hoping one of them will be sent the game with the crystal football for all the marbles. Auburn (of course) plays old school football. Terrifying defense and pounding the ball. However it should be a little wary of a Florida team that seems to improve every week. Florida enters the schedule from hell (Alabama, LSU, Auburn, Georgia) and if somehow survives unscathed should immediately vault to the top of the polls).
Jeers: To TV. This week it was revealed that part of the problem in the SNAFU between Oregon and Oklahoma was that TV personnel were screaming at the replay official the entire time to hurry up. I'm not sure a) why TV reps have direct access to the replay official and b) what type of glaze to use with my salmon tonight but I'm pretty sure that both issues need to resolved and quickly.
Jeers To Wacky facts. Iowa has never defeated a number one team in its history (0-7-1). Tressel has never won a night road game during Big 10 conference play (0-3). No road team has ever won in the newly remodeled home of the Hawkeyes (0-0). This leads me to direct conclusion that this game would be better with beer (325-2).
Cheers: To Grady Sizemore. Grady did something this year that has not happened in 70 years: 10 triples, 50 doubles and 25 Home runs. Not too shabby.
Cheers: To this date in history. September 29 1352 B.C.: Egyptian pharaoh Akhenaten conceives principle of "one man, one vote." However, both the "one man" and "one vote" refer only to him. (Souce America: The Book)
Cheers and Jeers in the News:
At no point in time did cheers and jeers enter my vocabulary..... that I can recall.
-Senator George Allan
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