MMBSD: Returning to the Scene of the Crime

Well this week I'm pulling a CSI and analyzing the crime scenes of this week in football and other sports that go bump in the night....

Cleveland Stadium
It wasn't too long ago, 2001 to be exact, that Jacksonville visited Cleveland Browns Stadium and pandemonium broke out. Tim Couch was driving the Browns on a last second attempt to get a win. Couch through a completion, spiked the ball and prepared to heave the ball into the end zone which would propel the Browns to victory and possibly me into a rare state of happiness. However the zebras, better known as refs, overturned the completion, sending the Browns to defeat and ushering in an era of global warming and pirate attacks. As the only logical recourse Browns fans showed their displeasure by heaving bottles, batteries and the occasional radio at the refs and the Jags. Well the refs and Jags returned to the scene of the crime, read overturning the obvious catch, and once again the Browns got the short end of the stick. Charlie Frye, starting his first game, had beautiful completion to Antonio Bryant which was ruled out of bounds by refs obviously suffering from glaucoma or riverblindness. On the very next play, Brayleon Edwards, read the Browns only playmaker, tried to make a leaping catching but instead collapsed on the turf, clutching his knee. Knowing the Browns luck I'm sure it is a torn ACL. Browns fans, as constant as the Northern Star, retorted to the injustice by launching snowballs and the occasional dwarf at the referees.

Arrow Head Stadium
I think I heard somewhere that the Chiefs haven't lost in Arrowhead in December in well over 3 years. Denver swaggered in after besting Dallas and knowing that a win would pretty much sow up their division title. Jake Plummer sporting a resume this year of: 13 touchdowns, 2 interceptions, best mustache in the NFL and mostly likely to be mistaken for a cheesy 70s porn star. However Dick Vermeil and Chiefs kept their own playoff ambitions alive and sent Denver back with a very tenuous hold on first place. Although possessing an easier schedule than either KC or the Super-Chargers, Denver still has to head to San Diego so nothing is taken for granted.

Carolina
Michael Vick for some unknown reason has owned the Panthers. 6-0 including last year where Vick levitated into the end zone (a neat trick I suggest you all try it some time). Not this time. The Panther defense played like well the Panthers defense and beat Michael Vick upside his head. Atlanta is in a tough spot with three very difficult games and I think their playoff chances are done, finito, terminated, etc.

NYMets
Is there anything the Mets would like to steal from the Marlins that they haven't already? Maybe the Marlins will give up the owner's wife in exchange for a postcard of the Bronx Zoo? I hear Dontrelle Willis can be had for some big league chew. Yeesh.

Non-Crime Related Thoughts
- Best non-BCS bowl game...the Peach Bowl: Miami v. LSU. Best under the radar only watch it because its an expected shoot-out...Vitalis Sun: Northwestern v. UCLA.
-Most disappointing college football team...Tennessee. Most disappointing NFL team...Jets. Most disappointing NBA team so far...Houston (its not the van Gundy's fault the Rockets can't play any defense). Best beard by an athlete...Pau Gasol's.
- Most important question of the bowl season....Does OSU's defense stand a chance when Charlie Weis has a full month to game plan? I would note Peter Carroll's USC defense v. Texas' offense might yield similar predictions. Give pro coordinators that much time and they will beat college coaches.
- I like the Indians signing of Paul Byrd. He replaces Scott Elarton. Two years. Not a big risk. I think an improvement over Elarton. Of course that’s assuming he stays healthy.
- Best Headline: Vandals Burn Swedish Christmas Goat, Again