All of the things I’m about to tell you regarding TO’s B-day party, I just want everyone to know that these facts are 100% true, according to Yahoo. Here’s the link. http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051213/ap_on_sp_fo_ne/fbn_owens_party
With a guest list including Mike Ditka, Ravens LB Ray Lewis, and ESPN’s favorite toke-master, Michael Irvin, TO threw a big bash on Monday night in Philly. Approximately 19 current Eagles were in attendance, including Westbrook, Lito Sheppard, and Jevon “The Freak” Kearse. Michael Irvin led the crowd in a rendition of "Happy Birthday," holding a celebratory cake up for Owens to see. (Why is this not on the internet?) TO hired scantily clad women wearing different colored No. 81 jerseys with question marks replacing the team logos. (HOW is this not on the internet?)
The best part about the article, is that it provides a laundry list of ways TO annoyed the Eagles:
1) Violating the dress code on road trips (TO would never do that!)
2) Parking in his coaches’ parking spots at the practice facility (TO just wants equality for all)
3) Sleeping through a team meeting
4) Not bringing his playbook to a team meeting (TO has memorized the whole playbook of course)
5) Bringing his playbook to a team meeting, but refusing to open it (Like I said, TO has memorized the whole playbook, and this incident only proves that).
The real question is why this was not a reality TV special. If reality TV can show us things like “The Season,” and MTV's "Super Sweet 16," I demand to see highlights of TO's ridiculous party! Anyways, on to the picks…
Manwich Matchup of the Week
KC @ NY Giants – Wow. Both of these teams need victories to improve/secure playoff positions. Unfortunately for the Chiefs, the Giants have been almost unbeatable at home.
Pick: NY Giants
Upset of the Week-
San Diego @ Indy- I’ve had this game in the back of my mind for a long time. Now that the Chargers lost to the Dolphins last week, they are going to be more desperate than ever before. They have to win this game. And I fully believe that the desperation will be more inspiring than Indy’s quest for a perfect season, considering they already have homefield advantage secured.
Pick: San Diego
TB @ New England- Tampa is suddenly leading their division, and I don’t see the Pats as a problem in their quest for the NFC South.
Pick: Tampa
Denver @ Buffalo- The Bills are in shambles, absolute shambles. McGahee is dinged up, Moulds is suddenly a problem child. At least Lee Evans catches a 50-yard pass each week.
Pick: Denver
Arizona @ Houston- It’s become pretty apparent that the Texans are either the most cursed team in football or they really want Reggie Bush. I mean, why would someone want Reggie Bush?
Pick: Arizona
CAR @ New Orleans- CAR is inconsistent as hell, but for their sake, this is practically a must-win game.
Pick: CAR
NY Jets @ Miami- After the Dolphins got shut-out by the pathetic Cleveland Browns, they have won 3 STRAIGHT games! This is looking like a team to watch for next season.
Pick: Miami
Philly @ St. Louis- Did you know? Both of these teams are an unreal 2-7 in the NFC.
Pick: St. Louis
Pittsburgh @ Minnesota- Both teams are 8-5 and really needing victories, similar to the intra-conference showdown between KC and the Giants. All I’ve learned from this season is that nothing brings a team together like a sex boat controversy.
Pick: Minnesota
Seattle @ Tennessee- Too easy.
Pick: Seattle
San Fran @ Jacksonville- Jacksonville got really lucky with this easy schedule at the end of the season.
Pick: Jacksonville
Cincy @ Detroit- Introducing, your 2005 AFC North Division Champions, the Cincy Bungles!
Pick: Cincy
Cleveland @ Oakland- Quite the intriguing game, full of backup QBs, and QBs that were benched, and are now returning, but may be leaving again. Ultimately, I have to pick against a rookie QB on the road.
Pick: Oakland
Dallas @ Washington- Last time they met, Dallas got burned by two Santana Moss touchdowns in the waning minutes. Unfortunately for the Cowboys, the weather will probably not be in their favor.
Pick: Washington
Atlanta @ Chicago- I’m saying once again, that Atlanta is more desperate, and will reveal the Bears as a pretender. The greatest concern I have is the weather, and Vick’s ribs, but I have to stand by my biased opinions.
Pick: Atlanta
Green Bay @ Baltimore- This is why starting next year, Monday Night Football won’t be choosing the last 4 games of the season until mid-way through, so that we avoid completely worthless games.
Pick: Baltimore
Last week: 11-5
Season: 135-73
Manwich Matchup: 8-6 (KC barely lost to Dallas)
Upset Special: 2-12 (So picking the Bills was not a very smart idea)
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