Week 14 – Short and Sweet

I apologize for the brevity, the lack of analysis, and the lack of humor. On to the games.

Manwich Matchup
KC @ Dallas- This is practically a knockout game, with the loser facing long odds of making the playoffs. Even though its in Dallas, I don't think Larry Johnson can be stopped. At this point, he’s good enough that I’d be okay with Larry Johnson using the NY Knicks' LJ gesture on each touchdown run and gain of more than 20 yards. I wonder if Grandmama would get mad, or whether he'd be proud of someone excelling with the same name.
Pick: KC

Upset of the Week
NE @ Buffalo- The Pats could probably lay an egg this week and still win the division. Plus, I feel bad for the Bills after blowing yet another game.
Pick: Buffalo

Chicago @ Pittsburgh- Here's my rationalization against the Bears this week: The Steelers are definately more desperate at this point, now that they won't even make the playoffs and are needing lots of help.
Pick: Pittsburgh

Cleveland @ Cincy- It wouldn't be a Browns season without a multitude of season-ending injuries. Rumor has it there's a cure for this jinx deep in the Amazon jungle and Coach Romeo Crennel is already sharpening his machete.
Pick: Cincy

Houston @ Tennessee- Houston should continue to pretend to try and make the games close, only to lose, just to ensure that #1 pick.
Pick: Tennessee

Indy @ Jacksonville- 2 more wins and Indy gets homefield I think. I have this feeling that Garrard can't provide enough offense against Indy's defense.
Pick: Indy

Oakland @ NYJets- so, using a 5th-string QB has a correlation on wins and losses?
Pick: Oakland

St. Louis @ Minnesota- When NFL films produces the "2005 Minnesota Vikings" story, do you think they'll mention the sex boat incident as the turning point of the season?
Pick: Minnesota

TB @ CAR- TB has looked shaky of late, though they continue to find ways to win. I don't think they'll be so lucky this weekend.
Pick: CAR

NYGiants @ Philly- The Eagles season from hell is complete. Mcnabb, TO, and Westbrook are all M.I.A. until 2006. They mine as well lose out the season to improve their draft position. The real question at this point is what kind of gag gifts TO sends to Andy “Hungry Hippo” Reid. For all we know right now, TO is mailing in boxes of donuts with special notes like, “From your favorite deactivated receiver- I heard chocolate frosted is your favorite.”
Pick: NY Giants

San Fran @ Seattle- Seattle still has to play for homefield advantage. I still can't believe I just said that.
Pick: Seattle.

Wash @ Arizona- I've picked Arizona way too many times this season.
Pick: Washington

Baltimore @ Denver- Denver at home is almost a guarantee at this point.
Pick: Denver

Miami @ San Diego- Super Chargers can't be stopped. You can only hope to contain.
Pick: San Diego

Detroit @ Green Bay- Toilet bowl of the week. Who's more hopeless at this point?
Pick: Green Bay
New Orleans @ Atlanta- Atlanta is in a must-win, and you'd figure they will take care of business.Pick: Atlanta

Last week: 15-1
Season: 124-68
Manwich Matchup: 8-5 (CAR just kept Vick bottled up)
Upset Special: 2-11 (If it wasn’t for the Rams, I would have had the perfect week… and I still will continue to pick an upset special, despite my lack of skill)