MMBSD: Midseason Awards

Well its house cleaning time over here at the MMBSD. Yep, we're around the midseason point of the NFL season (with bye weeks the exact midpoint is more of a misnomer), the stretch run for college football and the first week of NBA. So I'm handing out midseason awards, lollipops and whoop ass. Why? Well mostly because I couldn't think of a single topic

Giant Testicle Award - Goes to Dick Vermeil. Say what you will about Dick's waterworks but the thing that stands out is his giant brass pair. Its 23-20, Chiefs are on the half yard. The book says kick the field goal and play for OT. But the old man writes his own rules. He runs 20-Blast with Johnson running behind the mammoth Will Shields. Chiefs win. The playoff hopes remain alive and I have to figure out how you mail a giant bronze testicle shaped award to Vermeil without getting arrested.

Paper Tiger Award goes to Tampa Bay. Paper tigers are one of my favorite metaphors. They look fearsome. In theory they're potent. But when you match a paper tiger against the real thing, the difference is apparent. Tampa Bay was exposed as a paper tiger when they faced the real deal in Carolina. Yes Brian Griese is better than Chris Simms but lets be real about Tampa. The only difference between last years bottom feeder and this year is Cadillac Williams. Tampa will be better than last year and maybe even contend for a playoff spot but they're not the real deal.

Under the Radar - goes to Carolina. This is a team a number of prognosticator’s (including yours truly) picked for the Super Bowl. A few losses early and they were dismissed. Don't look now (don't you worry, Chris Berman won't) but the Panthers have won five straight and positioning themselves for a head to head matchup with the Falcons for control of the NFC South.

Toughest Division - Goes to AFC West. No easy games in that division, which is why I stand by my prediction that wild card will not be from the AFC West. They'll beat themselves up allowing Jacksonville and either Cinci/Pittsburgh to waltz into the playoffs. Denver has the lead but if you think they'll easily capture that crown you’re smoking something (not that there is anything wrong with that).

Natalie Holloway Nobody Gives a Crap But the Media Award - Once in awhile the media goes off into its own little world of feeding frenzy on stuff I could care less about. TO being suspended by the Eagles falls into that category. We/they/entire world already covered the benefits and costs of suspending TO. Everybody knows TO is a first ballot lock for the Polly Prissypants Hall of Fame. But somehow when TO mouths off something that can is be classified in the DSM IV book of abnormal psychology, the sports media goes all wacky. The Eagles season was on life support already. Focus on other stuff already (and yes I have already thought of the irony of writing about the issue if I prefer to ignore it so don't go there).


Random Thoughts that I think that I think
I like the Cavs new additions but its going to take a little time before they hit on all cylinders. See this year the Cavs have a coach the has things called "plays", also he does things called "adjustments". Mark my words though this team will improve as the year goes on (barring injury or voodoo curses). Larry and Phil have their work cut out for them and anyone thinking miracles can be done in the first week is smoking crack. That said I don't think Jesus could get rebounding out of Kwame Brown or Eddie Curry. Is it sacrilegious to consider the limits of Jesus' coaching abilities? Shawn Marion isn't that bad of a player and he could keep the Suns afloat until reinforcements arrive. The crisis of the Earth exploding due to a NCAA season of too many undefeated teams has largely been contained. Outside of pesky Alabama (which apparently nobody cares about despite its history that rivals Penn State or Notre Dame) it’s USC v. another Big 12 team being led to the slaughter. Finally, as a piece of financial advice, if someone offers you property in the Paris suburbs, don't take it.