Week 9 – And Knowing is Half the Battle

I thought I’d continue our GI Joe theme…

1) I caught this headline on SI.com by Jay Mohr about the “real issue that’s killing the NBA.” Basically, Jay Mohr says the problem is that 2nd round picks hardly make an NBA roster, whereas in the NFL, a 6th round pick (i.e. Tom Brady) can be a Super Bowl MVP. Jay – did you KNOW that an NFL team has 50 players, whereas the NBA only has 12, perhaps explaining why 2nd round picks do not often make the team or have much impact?
And knowing, is half the battle!

2) During my 7 minutes of Sportscenter in the morning, ESPN went to their “college analyst, Mark May” to preview the V-tech –Miami game. Mark May has a very interesting opinion – he thinks there are 3 keys to the game. 1) Defense, 2) QBs and how they affect the offense… now at this point I’m laughing. I’m thinking that some producer at ESPN will stop him, but his “3rd key to the game is special teams. Special teams can really affect a game.” Now Mark May KNOWS the 3 parts of the game. I don’t want to steal the thunder from another blogger, but a pie may be of order…

On to the games, where there are only 4 home favorites this week, so it could be a wild week:

Editor’s Note: All quotes are actual quotes from the “Knowing is Half the Battle” segment at the end of the GI Joe show, courtesy of: http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Set/1577/joeendings.html (you can find all 33 lessons there)-

Manwich Matchup of the Week:
Indy @ New England- As if there was even a question who was going to be the Manwich Matchup… everyone has jumped on the Indy bandwagon and everyone believes they will exorcise the Patriots demons that have tormented them for the last few seasons. Indy even had a bye week to prepare. I’m just hoping they get the job done, because I DON’T want to be reading articles about the genius of Bill Belichick on Tuesday morning.
Pick: Indy

Upset of the Week:
Pittsburgh @ Green Bay- I’m going out on a limb and going with the Packers. They’re at home, so that should be good for 3 wins I’m guessing. In addition, Pittsburgh is banged up and coming off of a short week. I also expect Brett Favre to get glasses/contacts this week in order to reduce the number of interceptions he’s thrown. As one of the GI Joes once said to a 10-year old – “Maybe you stink at baseball because you need glasses. Having your eyes tested may clear things up. Don't avoid a problem. Meet it ( and beat it).” I wish I made that up.
Pick: Green Bay

Chicago @ New Orleans- I want to pick New Orleans, but they are absolutely hapless without Deuce McAllister. Please note, with the Bears sweep of the Lions, they are most likely going to the playoffs, where they would host the top NFC wildcard [either Carolina/Atlanta/Philly/NY Giants]. Their defense would have to score 14 points for them to have a chance.
Pick: Chicago

Atlanta @ Miami – I think Shaq and company would beat the Hawks.
Pick: Atlanta

CAR @ Tampa Bay- Steve Smith is amazing. A magician! And Stephen Davis is a fantasy god-send, scoring 2 TDs every week!
Pick: CAR

Cincy @ Baltimore- Carson Palmer will continue the onslaught, as Brian “Cobra Commander” Billick hisses out “Retreaattt!”, just like every other episode.
Pick: Cincy

Houston @ Jacksonville- The Texans won a game last week because he followed Shipwreck’s advice: “Don't run away from home- Isn't it better to try to solve problems instead of runnin' away from 'em?... And remember, running away (leads nowhere).”
Pick: Jacksonville

Oakland @ KC- So who is that guy on the right of Cobra Commander?
Pick: KC

San Diego @ NY Jets- San Diego is the most incredible 4-4 team in the universe.
Pick: San Diego

Tennessee @ Cleveland- I’m absolutely done picking the Browns this season. As Flint on GI Joe once said: “Don't get mad at your goalie for letting in a bad goal. Will yelling at Billy help?... Look, if you want to play your best you got to play like a team. Remember, you need teamwork to win, not arguments.”
Pick: Tennessee

NYGiants @ San Fran- The 49ers are down to their 4th & 5th string QBs. I think they should heed a lesson from… “How to stop a nose bleed- Pinch your nose closed and lean forward. If it doesn't stop in 5 minutes, pack your nose with gauze and pinch it closed for ten more minutes. If its still bleeding, then see a doctor.” Can GI Joe really give medical advice?
Pick: NY Giants

Seattle @ Arizona- I almost picked Arizona. Almost. But then I remembered seeing some of their players jumping over downed, live electrical power wires. And GI Joe once said: “Don't jump your bike over downed power lines. --Remember, don't play around electric wires or you could be playing with fire.”
Pick: Seattle

Philly @ Washington- This should be quite the interesting game. I think Washington is going to be pumped as hell to redeem themselves from last week’s 36-0 shellacking. I don’t think Philly has to be alarmed yet. As said on GI Joe – “Don't pull the fire alarm unless there's a fire. Remember, a firefighter's job is to fight fires- not answer false alarms.”
Pick: Washington

Last week: 9-5
Season: 69-47
Manwich Matchup: 4-4 (The Broncos thrashed the Eagles)
Upset Special: 2-6 (That is the last time I pick the Browns this year.)